In what ways does the character perceive experiences through their senses?
One of my favorite tricks for making a scene vivid is using sounds and smells. They create so much more atmosphere than visual descriptions.
In deep POV, you show how characters experience things through their own senses.
Some people have a pronounced sense of hearing or a strong sense of rhythm. Others notice colors, shapes, or sizes. Some are aware of movement or of speed.
Yet others notice noise or the faint whiff of any pleasant or unpleasant odor.
Some people are sensitive about temperatures or about how textures feel to the touch, or on their skin.
Which sensory perception does your POV character have especially developed?
Have your character describe things or their surroundings whenever appropriate using their senses. It creates a more vivid picture for your reader.
For example, if they’re a musician with a keen ear and a strong sense of rhythm, they will hear things more than they will see them.
They will describe birds singing, traffic noises, ticking grandfather clocks, creaking stairs, crashing waves, and the raising of someone’s voice.
If they have a developed sense of smell, they will observe the smell of every place they visit, as well as every person they meet.
They’ll detect the scent of disinfectant, a trace of urine, leather, horses, and note that their rival, who usually wears Chanel No. 5, is wearing Fendi Donna today.
Which sense should I choose?
The ancient Greek Aristotle listed five senses: sight, sound, touch, smell, and taste. But actually, there are more senses than those five. There’s also a sense of balance, of movement, of temperament, of pain and more. Although those can be more difficult to build into your fictional character as a regular feature.
If you don’t know what to choose, ask your character. They’ll probably tell you.
Their job or hobby will probably give you a clue.
For a sculptor, it may be touch; for a chef, it maybe taste; for a landscape artist, it maybe colors.
Male and female sensory points of view
Men and women experience the world differently.
The same situation may trigger a unique experience. This is important for authors who write from the POV of the opposite gender.
Things men notice most:
- body postures
- female body shapes, especially breast (regardless of whether he fancies the woman)
- anything to do with hierarchy (especially their own, and other men’s, place in the pecking order)
- the size of things, especially their height
- movement, especially fast movements
- the speed of things, especially vehicles
- anything to do with motors
- tools
- weapons
- furniture and interior decorating, etc.
Of course, individual characters may be different.
Gender is not the only factor; personal interest and training also play an important role.
A girl who grew up among brothers and trained as a plumber will know tools much better than a young lady in the Regency era where male servants handled such matters.
Facial expressions and postures
For a man, facial expressions come far down the sequence of observations. Only after observing a person’s body shape, posture, and any tools or weapons they may hold. He may notice their facial expressions; even then, there is a possibility of misinterpreting the situation.
This differs from how women perceive things.
Women observe the facial expression first, especially the eyes and the smile, and overall, are pretty good at reading the person’s mood.
Men, however, are good at reading the body language of posture.
They notice subtle posture shifts and that a fight is about to break out, where a woman is less attuned to those clues.
Women would rather talk it out than fight it out.
If you’re a woman writing male POV, or a man writing female POV you need to leave your own way of thinking behind. You should get into the opposite genders mind. Anything else will feel unconvincing to the reader.
Situation mood filters
There are things that she will notice because of her current mood or situation. And on another day, she would not notice them at all.
What does the character notice in this situation?
- Mary is pregnant for the first time. She sees pregnant women, babies, toddlers, and toys everywhere. Last year, she wouldn’t have paid much attention to them.
- Mary’s a teenager with a crush on a boy who rides a red motorbike. She sees red motorbikes everywhere while that crush lasts. When she falls in love with someone else, her mind will no longer direct her attention to red motorbikes.
How does the character perceive the details?
Even if two characters observe the same details, they will perceive them differently, depending on their mood.
Don’t tell your reader what mood your character is in. Instead, choose words which create that mood in the reader’s mind. And better still. Show your readers your character is in a mood.
Remember – Show-Don’t-Tell.
Let’s say your character walks along the beach where waves were washing over the pebbles. Here are seven ways to convey the same image:
Waves raked the pebbles.
Waves played with the pebbles.
Waves scraped the pebbles.
Waves licked at the pebbles.
Waves teased the pebbles.
Waves drench the pebbles.
Waves caressed the pebbles.
Here are a few show, don’t tell examples:
- Her footprints vanished, swallowed by a wave that polished the pebbles before sliding back into the ocean.
- Each wave cuffed her ankles, rattling pebbles against her heels.
- The shoreline rolled a sheet of water across the pebbles, then pulled back.
- Salt spray touched her calves while pebbles tumbled like coins in the surf..
Which of these creates the mood your character feels like now?
That’s the one to choose.
When selecting words to convey your character’s mood, focus on verbs, because verbs evoke the strongest impression without patronizing your reader.